Dear Eric and Rubie, Received 11 February 2011

Eric and Rubie:

You won't read this for many years and it won't mean much to you for some time.  However, I feel it important to write to you regarding my experience here at BCT.  One of the motivating factors for the decision to enlist was the opportunity to teach you things of value.  I know you will both face challenges in your lives.  The point isn't to completely avoid such test rather the point is how you respond.  It is the sum of the many daily choices we make that defines who we are.

Here at BCT I live and work in very close quarters with ~250 people from all walks of life.  Each one with their own background and perspective.  Of those about 12 are LDS but even they have their unique stories. 

One of the greatest challenges with all of these people is the difference in their values and what they believe to be good or bad and the values and standards Mom and i strive to live by.  These are the values and standards we are teaching to each of you.  The difference shows in the language everyone uses here.  The talk is extremely foul, vulgar, and crude. The challenge for me is two-fold.  1) I can't participate and engage in a lot of the "camaraderie" because I would then pollute and corrupt myself.  Also, it would be an endorsement of such behavior which I can't do.  I don't want to compromise my values.  2) I can't judge and think less of the people I work and live with.  I have to do my best to look for the positive in them.  i have to find ways to relate with and establish camaraderie with them that don't compromise who I am and my standards.  

Ultimately this is done through two fundamental concepts, A) I have to be confident in who I am (which is to say my values and standards) and comfortable that not everyone is going to agree with or approve of me.  Key here is love of self and remember God loves you.  B) when your focus is true charity and love for others you will genuinely be able to look past their weaknesses (not embracing/engaging those weaknesses) and see their strengths.  Your mother would say that this is seeing others as God sees them.  And she is right.

Also a challenge I have here is with the Drill Sergeants and my peers.  It is human nature to have negative thoughts/emotions in response to others.  At each moment one has such a thought you have a choice to make.  Either embrace the thought/emotion and build upon it or abandon it and look for a positive optimistic perspective.  For example: many of my peers talk about how much they hate this drill sergeant or that soldier.  And while there are aspects of each one that I can agree with them on I have decided to strive to find the positive perspective.  To further the example most within the Platoon openly dislike DS Wall.  She is aggressive and intense.  Of the four Drill Sergeants 1st Platoon has she is the most particular about details, the most consistent about enforcing them and invokes the most emotion in her manner of calling attention to those out of compliance.  All of that I observe, my peers would agree but would use a different vocabulary to describe her.  Here is my opinion of Drill Sergeant Wall: she is a professional who takes her job very seriously.  Her job is to be a Drill Sergeant and that means putting a lot of pressure and stress to test and develop young civilians into sound soldiers.  As long as you follow every instruction with exactness she leaves pretty much alone.  One mis-step and she will indiscriminately reprimand.  She is very aware of insubordination "attitude" and has a zero tolerance for it.  Her escalating intensity is reflective of certain individuals' persistence with the issue. One thing that helps me is observing her interest with the other Drill Sergeants.  She laughs and displays a fun personality.  Also, she does take the time (generally) to explain the expectations (how to perform a certain movement) and ensure they are understood.  She does this calmly and particularly.  Once she's done that then it's on and she holds us accountable.  Also, I think of the incredible work schedule these Drill Sergeants maintain.  They are here to wake us up at 4:30am and they are with us pretty much straight until 9:00pm, seven days a week.  They only get Thanksgiving Day and Christmas off.  They run a cycle for 10 weeks and might get as much as 2 weeks in between, often they only have a weekend break.  That much work, the stress and pressure combined with the role they are paid to play makes me look at the Drill Sergeants and after the initial human response of anger or negative thinking I have to acknowledge that they are doing a good job and for that I respect them.

This is an example of what I mean by having more than one option of for how you respond to people and/or circumstances in your life.  I hope that as you grow and develop you will master your emotions and thinking to successfully manage such.

Today we attended church for the 2nd week in a row.  Today is the Super Bowl however the only thing I miss is having my girl by my side and our two beautiful children with us.  For tonight's class session Drill Sergeant Wells (the senior DS) opened up a bit and talked to us about growing up in Philly, his three deployments and a lot of his opinions on various topics.  He talked about feeling it an honor to serve his country.  Somewhat lighthearted anecdote came out whild he was talking about serving in the Army:

DS Wells: Rhetorical Question--"Ask me if I want to give my life for my country soldier?"
PVT Holliday: "Do you want to give your life for your country Drill Sergeant?"
DS Wells: "Hell no! Soldier.  But I'll do my job when it's time."

It was a real good class/discussion and my esteem for DS Wells grew a lot tonight.  He is definitely a leader I'd go into battle with.

Our platoon is coming together and we're becoming friends.  In coming letters I'll try to wrtie about some of the members of the platoon.  I think I may be able to call next week sometime, which by the time you get this it could be within a few days.  I hope I'll be stronger this time and able to stay on the phone.  Hearing your voices is bitter sweet as I miss you so very much.  I got the paintings from Eric and Rubie and they are treasures to me.  I love my family so incredibly much.

Love,
Dad